All was well.
But as I proceeded to grow, there were times when I felt like I was the bad guy. The parasite. The worm who allegedly caused one of the petals to wilt. It seemed like they have condemned me for doing so.
I just wanted the earth to swallow me whole.
I kept a straight face, but barely. I felt like I would burst at that instant. It's hard to control your emotions when you're going through so much.
I can't help but imagine their faces. Laughing at the outside, mocking on the inside.
For the second time, I wanted the earth to swallow me whole.
I didn't know why it hurt so much. Maybe because I was thinking that I was trying to help when deep inside their minds and hearts I was hurting them. Or maybe they expected too much from me and I let them down.
And now, all I could feel is frustration.
